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The Importance of Trust and Communication in a D/s Relationship

Trust is just another word for respect in a relationship. Any relationship. Without trust the bonds formed between two people ultimately fall apart. No matter how hard you try, if trust is not there your relationship will not survive. This is true in marriage, a loving couple, friends and yes it is also very true in a D/s relationship. Maybe even more so because of the nature of the attachment and what the relationship is between a dominant and submissive partner.

When you choose to enter in to a D/s relationship, you have to first make sure that you are willing not only to trust your partner but to be completely honest with them so they can trust you. Even if you are the submissive partner this is important. Dominant or submissive this type of relationship is a power exchange and any mistrust can easily destroy it or at the very least cause it to change in a manner you may not want. There are many boundaries and limits that will be expressed and explored, so it is nearly impossible for a relationship to survive if there is not trust and excellent communication.

Communication of Limits and Boundaries

First of all limits and boundaries. These are how you decide and define your D/s relationship from the very beginning. It is based on communication, you have to sit down together and honestly discuss what you do an do not like and what you will and will not do. Imagine if this relationship suffered a communication break down. The Dominant partner is counting on the submissive partner to tell them the truth about what their limits are and where the boundaries they won’t cross lie. This isn’t possible without complete honesty. Communication breaks down when you don’t share effectively with one another. Being honest includes saying what you like, even if you feel you really prefer to be surprised believe me, you don’t want to be surprised in the wrong way. So make sure you tell your Dominant Partner not only what you don’t want to try, but what you very much do.

This goes both ways of course. A Dominant partner has to be equally open and honest about their needs and expectations in a D/s Relationship. When you do not communicate, there can easily be misunderstandings that lead to dangerous situations. When a Dominant partner isn’t sharing with a submissive partner it can cause the submissive to lose trust in their Dominant and in the relationship as a whole. When you have expectations of someone, this has to be communicated and if you do not, but instead assume the submissive knows what you expect, this can lead to problems with limits and boundaries and we know that in a D/s relationship that can be very destructive.

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Submission is the Ultimate Trust

When you are in a D/s Relationship it is the same and also very different from a regular couple. Each person has their role to play and these roles lead to sexual games and daily power exchanges. As we all know a Dominant partner only has dominance over a submissive partner who allows it, when you are in these roles there is a perceived amount of control. Because of this a submissive partner must trust in the dom completely. Unlike in a relationship that is not based in D/s, where one partner can mostly trust the other or you share most of your secrets and it’s okay, in a relationship of control, there has to be total trust and disclosure.

When a Dominant partner is in the position to issue instructions to the submissive, in order to submit and enjoy the exchange there has to be excellent communication and the ability to trust that the person you are communicating with is going to follow what you have asked. Both for a Dominant partner who will lose faith in a submissive who does not do as told, and for a submissive partner who counts on the trust they have in their Dom. They must believe wholeheartedly in the fact that their FemDom who owns their cock will also always be aware of the boundaries they do not want to cross. They must know without a doubt that no matter what this is something they can know to be true.

Without trust, the D/s relationship does not work at all. Whether it is sharing information, establishing boundaries or testing limits. For both partners to be happy and fulfilled there has to be communication and trust!